{"product_id":"don-t-follow-me-tee","title":"DON'T FOLLOW ME TEE","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003e[ Do not proceed if you are the designated responsible adult in the room. ]\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThis is a courtesy notice.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThere's a version of you that makes highly questionable decisions with complete conviction. That texts first. That stays way too long. That orders the thing, takes the trip, and says yes to something that requires a lot of explaining later.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eNot reckless. Just unbothered by consequences in a way that other people find either admirable or alarming depending entirely on how close they're standing.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe warning is genuine. You're not asking anyone to stop you. You're asking them to be clear-eyed about what they're signing up for.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\"Don't follow you.\" Because if they do, they need to keep up. And you do stupid things with full confidence, zero hesitation, and very little regret.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eThis file is built for the version of you that refuses to apologize.\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThis is not a novelty t-shirts. Our T-shirt are psychological warning labels. The front is the courtesy notice. The back is the uncompromising reality.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cb\u003eFront: DON'T FOLLOW ME [ PUBLIC WARNING. ]\u003c\/b\u003e Said clearly. Said for their benefit.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cb\u003eBack: I DO STUPID THINGS [ WITH CONFIDENCE. ]\u003c\/b\u003e And you're not stopping.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eLet the heavy-weight fabric do the heavy lifting. You don't have to explain your chaos. Just wear the warning.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e300 GSM heavyweight cotton. Oversized fit. Screen-printed front and back.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFree US shipping. Return it if it's not yours full refund, no questions.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"ODMPOD","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":59456013173022,"sku":"260617PODPQ7986#001","price":49.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":59456013205790,"sku":"260617PODPQ7986#002","price":49.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":59456013238558,"sku":"260617PODPQ7986#003","price":49.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":59456013271326,"sku":"260617PODPQ7986#004","price":49.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":59456013304094,"sku":"260617PODPQ7986#005","price":49.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ S","offer_id":59456013009182,"sku":"260617PODPQ7993#001","price":49.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ M","offer_id":59456013041950,"sku":"260617PODPQ7993#002","price":49.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ L","offer_id":59456013074718,"sku":"260617PODPQ7993#003","price":49.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":59456013107486,"sku":"260617PODPQ7993#004","price":49.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":59456013140254,"sku":"260617PODPQ7993#005","price":49.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sky Blue \/ S","offer_id":59456012681502,"sku":"260617PODPQ7993#011","price":49.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sky Blue \/ M","offer_id":59456012714270,"sku":"260617PODPQ7993#012","price":49.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sky Blue \/ L","offer_id":59456012747038,"sku":"260617PODPQ7993#013","price":49.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sky Blue \/ XL","offer_id":59456012779806,"sku":"260617PODPQ7993#014","price":49.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sky Blue \/ 2XL","offer_id":59456012812574,"sku":"260617PODPQ7993#015","price":49.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Mild Apricot \/ S","offer_id":59456012845342,"sku":"260617PODPQ7993#006","price":49.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Mild Apricot \/ M","offer_id":59456012878110,"sku":"260617PODPQ7993#007","price":49.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Mild Apricot \/ L","offer_id":59456012910878,"sku":"260617PODPQ7993#008","price":49.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Mild Apricot \/ XL","offer_id":59456012943646,"sku":"260617PODPQ7993#009","price":49.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Mild Apricot \/ 2XL","offer_id":59456012976414,"sku":"260617PODPQ7993#010","price":49.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Coffee \/ S","offer_id":59456013336862,"sku":"260617PODPQ7986#006","price":49.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Coffee \/ M","offer_id":59456013369630,"sku":"260617PODPQ7986#007","price":49.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Coffee \/ L","offer_id":59456013402398,"sku":"260617PODPQ7986#008","price":49.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Coffee \/ XL","offer_id":59456013435166,"sku":"260617PODPQ7986#009","price":49.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Coffee \/ 2XL","offer_id":59456013467934,"sku":"260617PODPQ7986#010","price":49.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0998\/7751\/9646\/files\/daa2f7b323574bbda89081eb118ad1ae.jpg?v=1785242151","url":"https:\/\/wearcaption.com\/products\/don-t-follow-me-tee","provider":"WEARCAPTION","version":"1.0","type":"link"}